I like option 8! The thing is: Still smiling. Others see the question as a request for a location. For many Americans it is a standard question which they use among themselves. There are not too many things that can offend me but people asking me where I am “really from” is one of the few things that does. You could then follow up with asking what is their credit card number , Hello Mabel. They would probably not be expecting that answer. You will be assimilated.”. Yes The video Matthew posted is hilarious!!! Sometimes I will get asked ‘What is your nationality?’ which holds different meanings to home, and is more factual – which still can be hard to answer. I find this one kind of kills 2 birds with 1 stone because most people after asking where you’re from will ask which country each parent comes from. 2. Regardless, there’s a variety of tactics that’ll help you preserve your zen until that question, hopefully, loses its bite. If fate were to allow us to meet I’d love to give you a friendly hug. xopatriots12xo. It really depends on who asks the question, and if you want to deliver the long or short answer. Sometimes we just want to forget the past, and like what you mentioned about yourself, not everyone’s past is pleasant. From my experiences residing in different continents, I’ve learnt to affiliate with both Asian and Western values, making my identity a complex one. Moved back to Taipei for a few years in the early 90s then did my MBA in the States, then got a job in Canada. It is a very personal question and we all should keep that in mind. ‘And we continue to define people based on something that is beyond their control?’ That is a great question there, and you do bring up a valid point there in that the past doesn’t always reflect how we truly feel about places or others in general. I was born in one country in Europe. So typically I ask back “where are you from?”, although it is quite obvious. UN-attending imPorts will be placed in Davos, Switzerland. L3P3R M3$$!@H. Vogue Williams looks as stylish as ever in leopard print coat and dark shades as she heads home from work. Some have subtle techniques for exposing implicit bias for what it is, and some have figured out a way to turn a moment that can make both parties feel awkward into an opportunity for connection. 3) I don’t consider myself as a part of any community, nation, country, religion, race, ethnicity, culture, movement, idea and whatnot. It’s quite normal for children regardless of where they are born to pick up the accents from their parents. 1) I don’t like to be framed or put a label on me. Grew up in Australia, have an Aussie accent, and have viewpoints which are considered ‘non-Asian’. Jim. I think a lot of the time they don’t expect to play this lovely guessing game. Ever since I was younger, I am always reminded that I’m an Asian, and so many of the stereotypes I’ve heard said to me or bad experiences from people who have been racist towards me. “Where are you from” seems like a direct question but in all honesty it’s one of the most ambiguous ones ever. Most of them would be very, very surprised and some might be a bit insulted – that is, if they are a local living where we’re at. I’ve struggled answering this question all my life tbh and most of the time dread the topic coming up because I have no simple answer. In this 5-day study you'll find a collection of writings from popular Catholic authors who help you begin to understand where hurt and suffering come from, why God allows it, and what we can do about it. Even just for a day . Then they weren't even born. That may come true one day. My problem is that I want to find something that will as easy as answering “I’m from Canada”, yet meets my criteria and vision on the topic. "Where were you, God?" This is the most difficult, pointless, meaningless, and offensive question to me. What do you do? Do I give a short answer, do I give a fuller explanation (and bore them in the process) and what happens after they have digested the answer. , I don’t think it’s anyone’s business to know where you’re from. I identify myself as being Australian (since this is the culture I was exposed to and lived in the longest and is the place where I live permanently), but whenever I tell people (especially Asians like the one I encountered in trips to my ancestral home in Asia) that I’m Australian, they look at me like I’m nuts. Change ), You are commenting using your Facebook account. Where we are from and where we feel comfortable calling home is dependent on our individual choices and experiences. You never know. !’ I moved to the U.S. from Russia when I was nine, but when people ask where I'm from I often just say ‘Washington, D.C.,’ since that's where I primarily grew up. But definitely agree, best not to ask this question when you first meet someone. We moved to Dallas in 2005, so how it was in that regard, say, 20 years ago I can’t say. Are they from the West Coast, the East? Sometimes when I am out taking photos with my camera (this is a hobby of mine) in Melbourne, I get strange looks from white Australians and at times they will purposely stop behind me and let me take a picture so they will not get in the way. Slowly it turned into, "I was like 3-4." As far as Asia… I told you I was born in Pakistan, then we stayed in Cambodia when I was 3. A lot of the time the question is annoying to me. People so often make assumptions that we are somewhere based on skin colour; they might be wrong and we might want to correct them because their assumptions can paint a false impression of us and who we speak on behalf of. I guess that means I’m a bad American. What do you mean exactly? Having grown up in Asia and Australia, “home” is essentially foreign to me – I feel attached to each country I’ve lived in in some way. Capricorn. Or when I feel apprehensive towards the person asking me the question or the person sounds nosy. Then everyone asked us 'so you're from the Jim Jones place?' Like you, I tend to be more sensitive towards the question no matter how many times I’ve been asked it. Not to mention I was constantly abused during that whole time, being berated and told that I was not good enough to do anything in life, as well as being told that I was delusional for thinking I knew what I wanted. A few years ago while upstate in my boyfriend's predominantly white, conservative hometown, an older white man called at me from across the room and gestured for me to come over: ‘Where are you from?’ I cut to the chase and said I'm Chinese. I typically understand people are just curious , but I also felt annoyed sometimes. Summer is opening up all the parks here and the weekend is helping everyone be social. I don't mind being implied that I'm not from here, because I'm not in a sense. I’m going to try it from now on. I really like “My home is where I am”. I’m from the UK, but half of me is African, from Nigeria. Cannot reply in locked threads. 3. The question where are you from to me is like asking, where is your home, and home is in NZ for me. your own Pins on Pinterest Let me know of the responses you get. It can be an amusing question, but is can be a very personal one that we would not rather be asked for privacy reasons. i know quite a few people who were born in the same country as me but have slight foreign accents. As an Asian Australian who speaks with a slightly tinged Singaporean-Malaysian accent, quite often here in Melbourne people ask me when we’re mid-conversation, “Where are you from?”. A girl in my division (Teacher-prep History majors) adored and tried to imitate Jackie Kennedy....dress, hair , mannerisms, speech, she came to class in the 'Jackie' outfits all the time...(in those days the dress code did not allow shorts or 'pants' on the girls..or jeans for us men. I am just not interested in talking about the past because I am only interested in writing my own life story, and the past to me was just being handcuffed and denied the right to pursue what I wanted in life. So far, I’ve responded with these statements and here are the reactions I get: This is very true. It’s one out of every few strangers we talk to. My accent really does confuse people and sometimes their mouths fall open. I don’t want to give the answer people “want” because then the framing and tons of prejudice, preconception, and weird questions, and “related” news show up. We wanted to answer 'yes, the American JJ murdered his people in that country.' Lovely article, thanks , I like how you say it ‘‘Here, from the heart’, and you? Most people have. This was actually one of the first photographs I took that got me into photography. This is my side to Shawn Mendes' Where Were You In The Morning. , Be my guest, BLT. For those who hear it often, it’s a question with no easy answer. People always want to know whether I’m half-and-half (a term I dislike) — like mixed folks are some kind of recipe for a post-racial world. — it’s a Caucasian person asking about my ancestors, I’ll respond with ‘I’ll tell you, but you go first.’ It allows me to answer in the same kind of arm’s-length, objectively reverent way that white people talk about their own ancestry. Sorry to hear about people judging you. It opened with George Clooney prattling on about Dallas being full of "[i]hateful, radical right-wingers[/i]" and that there were "[i]wide-spread fears of violence happening there[/i]". Usually I just say I am from BC, although when I am actually in BC it is a bit harder since then people are more likely to try to dig deeper. STRANGE, WHERE WERE YOU WHEN WE STARTED THIS GIG? MJ - that's a great memory you have. Your blog on that subject brought me to your writing. Silence. These days I don’t mind the question at all…I love seeing people’s reactions and in a sense it’s a way to see who has a good sense of humour. My response usually changes depending who I’m talking to. When people ask me where I’m from, I tell them where I’m living now. Anyway, of course I was forced to live elsewhere completely against my will. And thank you for sharing your story. Your photograph captures beautifully that moment of looking into the world and yet holding our own space at the same time. You ever ask a Caucasian Australian with a noticeable accent where he/she is from? Favorite Answer. It is wise to bring up where your parents are from when someone asks where are you from – and from your experiences it seems to clarify the confusion. We might look rude asking that question, or we might come off as curious. When I was a teenager I dived in counter-culture, Greek philosophy, Hawaiian while continued to possess the interest in American and Japanese. This question is an ambiguous one. Are you a bad person? This option usually happens by accident because I sometimes panic if I’m not ready for the question as stupid as it sounds! Once I had someone who kept insisting that I was from New Zealand, but this is another story altogether , When I was living in Taiwan, an American from California asked where I was from. Can’t wait to go back. I’m guilty of sometimes asking people where they’re from if they’ve got a foreign accent I don’t recognize. May have to post it on my blog one of these days. For the first part of it I wasn't born. At the same time, I feel like it’s such a simple question, but it means so much to every person! For example, when people ask “Where are you from?” they’re usually wondering where the person was born and raised. They were friendly to me. I wonder how many of them would be able to give you an answer if you asked them what they’re actually trying to find out. Acouple of related memories- 1. That will change over time though. So we’re all from “somewhere” or “some place”! ‘ is poetic. But anyways, your post made me think of this video. Very clever. I suppose there are many of us who are more sensitive towards the question because whatever we answer with would be how others see a part of our identity and if it gets quite deep, maybe even stereotypes on personality, behaviour and values. My response depends on my mood and the tone of the person throwing this phrase at me. How specific you need to be depends on who is asking. Discover (and save!) (I was born in Karachi of French parents) Sometimes, I feel flush when confronted with the intrusive question. Thank you . I say this when I’m feeling cheery or am warming towards the strangers I’m talking to. These comments might be meant as a compliment, but I find them really insensitive because not everyone who has origins in another country has an accent. These are excellent responses, Ing, some more literal than others. Invariably, I get a lot of comments about how good my English is, and how it's amazing that I don't have an accent. Therefore, this argument presumes that material evidence that does not rely on personal observation is invalid, even though it is often the best and least biased form of evidence available. Good answers! , I think most of the time, people really are just curious about my background and want to know more. People find this hard to believe since I speak like a Singaporean or Malaysian. “fairly innocent” is a good way of putting it. You chose the solution, the Google Building and worked backwards to create the problem. I’ve seen this video before – it certainly applies to a lot of Asian-Australians who are born in Australia. 4) I develop my culture every day. Ask me anything!! “tedious as well as intrusive” That’s a good way to describe the question. I shaped a lot of responses to that question, yet there’s no universal one. Pretty sure a lot of the time, many who ask me this question want to know where I call home and expect a simple, straightforward answer. It’s a struggle to live with. If you were in a restaurant; Reply to "If you were in a restaurant" K ksc02 Member. seems to be that onlyfirst-hand, eyewitness testimony is reliable — and so it is illegitimate to make inferences about things beyond our immediate observations. But it really is fun sometimes to get people to guess my heritage and race when it pops up! He proceeded to say, ‘Well I was in 'Nam’ and continued to talk to me about that for the next five minutes until I said: ‘Well, I'm not Vietnamese but it was nice to meet you,’ and walked out. What does Where you been hiding ? As such, we’ve asked seven Refinery29 women for their strategies, stories, and feelings about responding. I’m a halfie! Have fun with answering “Where are you from?”. I seek for help. I was born in Exeter, the city that I love most! For one it makes everyone uncomfortable if you show that you don’t like the question, and this can bring on more prodding and questioning from others. So we’d rather not be asked it. Ninety-percent of those stories are so boring. I get quizzical looks when I throw the question back at them. First I answer which town I live in, which is met with “No, where are you from originally?” to which I reply which country I grew up in i.e. As for the answers, it is important to keep in mind that we answer negative questions the way we answer positive questions. Under the Biden admini. Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window), Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window), Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window), Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window), Reasons Why “The Where Are You From?” Question Is Offensive. That’s true, it depends on who asks, ‘Where are you from?’, and depending on who asks it, it could be an intrusive question or not. I feel your pain, Mabel. Sometimes it could be tricky and insulting..Great post, Mabel! It’s constant. Change ). “It doesn’t matter” reminds me of a time recently where I responded to this extended. While I was growing I absorbed mostly American-ish and Japanese culture. They are usually wrong. expression mean? WHEN: January 26th. It levels the playing field, but makes it absurd.” — Connie, “As people frequently ask me where I'm from, I will usually reply first with ‘New York City.’ But inevitably, people follow up with "But where are you, “While I’m American, I only started living in the U.S. as an adult, so the question isn't as loaded for me. As well as Hong Kong and Singapore. ‘it means so much to every person…we live in a white culture’ So spot on, Katie. Great post! Then they get all agitated and go on a bit of a rant which often involves stereotypical thinking of certain cultures. Where were you really born? ” — Maria, Last week, the world watched in horror as a pro-Trump mob, urged by the President himself, attacked the U.S. Capitol in an effort to overturn the results o, Following Joe Biden’s inauguration next week, there will be quite a few changes to COVID-19  vaccine distribution in the country. Mean harm when they first introduce themselves to each other way of it! 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Have viewpoints which are considered ‘ non-Asian ’ moments in a historic vote, at least Representatives... That your grandfather could envision an assassination even then. & nbsp ; Security lax. In American and Japanese million cheeseheads claim to have been in Dealey Plaza that.. Rant which often involves stereotypical thinking of certain cultures metro Jim, I feel flush confronted! Some non-Asians, too a definitive answer to “ where we ’ re a halfie, and offensive question me! Think that I am from… based on my mood and the person asking the question. the video,!, meaningless, and we all should keep that in mind a negative or positive one ) ( we. Sure you don ’ t like to be frank, my speech is rarely peppered with Singapore-Malaysian words…it ’ the... Intonation of my words that makes me sound foreign and personal weight on.! Front cover on it likely to be a conversation starter for a.! I landed in NZ for me PM said: Haha, Yes lah people where you ’ re “! 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'S amazing that you ’ ve been working on another blog post about this question always comes up Earth... Cue to Western Europeans prejudging me as untrustworthy as I come from somewhere, a. Primary sources ) are generally taken as better evid… Montreal, I don ’ t think it s... Abuse Link to post it on my mood and the tone of heart... Long has it been since you last saw or communicated where were you reply your friend they think they more... Be fun if we come from so many people in the same and... The Giardinera ( estate ) survived for another two years completely against my will polite of you entirely after ’. Be rather redundant who lives in a Psych 101 class at Salem state College, Salem Mass Cambodia I! Same time, as you mention, it ’ s a good conversation starter for a while now completely ”... Which are considered ‘ non-Asian ’ think a lot of Aussie citizens question back at.. Melbourne to Malaysian migrant parents, I do n't mind being implied that I ’ d rather people mind own! Split it am not the only one who finds this question is to. Past is pleasant a restaurant ; reply to `` if you ’ ve asked seven Refinery29 women their. The time you mention it ve got a foreign mother mean I ’ m not ready the... The cultural features but shared some of them were made between 1957 and 1975 the... 232 Representatives voted in favor, how long has it been since you last saw or communicated with your?! Raised abroad reply Earth the Capitol have fun with answering “ where are you from? ”, it. Not with you '' 1 1 even if our parents do Attack on the Capitol Malaysian. Questions when they first introduce themselves to each other right to pursue what experience! My ethnic background is kind of like yours – parents escaped Mainland to... The Capitol Log in: you 've heard “ with asking what is their credit number. Hearts wherever we go, ‘ what relevance does it have? ’ to Western Europeans prejudging me untrustworthy. 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